I Know the Heart of Life is Good

The last time I wrote on here, I described my time studying abroad in Ireland. Today I write to talkabout life. I am by no means up to the level of expertise of “Dear Abby”. But a few days ago, a good friend of mine encouraged me to journal. In some ways, this can be a form of that. If anything, I want this to be a place of vulnerability, positivity, and relability. 

The truth is that this time a year ago I was in a bad place. I was hurting from things out of my control and my anxiety was at an all time high. I was getting ready to leave my first job in a few months. I was leaving a city that I loved exploring. I was having to say goodbye to many people whogot me through my first two years of adulthood. And I was terrified. What if moving back home didn’t fix anything? Why did it feel like I was starting all over again? But what I knew was that I couldn’t continue feeling the way that I was feeling. Something needed to change. 

Fast forward to today with a feeling that I have above everything else: Gratitude. I’m currently reading a book to my students about a girl who tragically loses her parents. This small group of people work together to help her heal and make her life manageable. At the part where we left off today, she had just announced to this group, “I just want to say thank you for all that you’ve done for me”. Sure, this is fiction. But her words rang true and struck a chord within. How often do we truly say thank you to the people who have helped us? Yes, it’s awkward and easier said than done. But it got me reflecting on why I chose my career path: to make an impact. 

It’s clear and simple, but my goal has always been to leave this place a little better than when I found it. If I can impact one student, one friend, one family member, one person reading this, shouldn’t that be enough? Rather than focusing on the magnitude of likes on a picture or whether or not this person has a seemingly better life than mine, why can’t it be enough to focus on the magnitude of how someone felt loved, heard, and appreciated by me? 

So today I’ll start with just a small list of who I’m grateful for.

Thank you to my Mom and Dad who have truly sacrificed and dedicated their lives to making their children feel empowered, loved, and safe.

Thank you to my three sibilings, who have mademe laugh, cry, vent, offered advice, and are really just the best friends I could ask for.

Thank you to my extended family of strong, hard-working, passionate people. You influence me daily and I’m thankful to know you.

Thank you to my best friends. The first few yearsof adulthood aren’t easy, and we may have fallen out of touch for a while, but the way we’ve been able to seamlessly pick up where we left off has been so incredibly meaningful to me.

Thank you to past and present coworkers . Your patience, guidance, and professionalism during my first three years of adulthood has been immensely helpful. I would not be the teacher that I am today without you.

Finally, thank you to those reading. If you’ve made it this far, thank you so much for your time and attention to these words. It’s been so therapeutic to write them, and knowing that it could potentially impact someone reading this gives me true joy.

Thank you.